Wednesday, October 19, 2011

TOMORROW... I LOVE YA... you're only a day away!

So everyone, the big day is tomorrow! Yep, we are FINALLY moving! This morning after Adam got off work (around 8 am) we went to sign all the closing papers!!!! Last night was the longest night of my entire life. It was seriously like Christmas! So tomorrow we get to pack up a U-Haul, lug all of our stuff to our new place, and then we get to unpack it!
(If anyone is willing to help, please let me know!)

We are so excited about this move... There is so much going on all at once. Carson is turning one in like two weeks, or less!
We will be having a Halloween Costume/ House Warming Party on October 29th, so let me know if you can come! (This party is family appropriate) Gifts for our new home are appreciated, but not required for the party! I can't wait to see you all at our new place.  :)

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Beginning of another story/book.

(We will see where this "story" goes. I'm feeling confident about it. It's not much, yet. I'll keep adding to it as ideas flow.)

I thought about you today. I think about you everyday. As I was thinking about you, I started to cry. Where are you now? I'm sure you're happy wherever you are, but I truly wish you were here. I wish I could lay on your chest and  tell you about my day, about the cute couple I saw at the grocery store, and how they were talking about their perfect wedding. She was still holding her bouquet and had her veil on. Wearing a white sundress. Do you remember our perfect wedding? How we had to stop at the gas station on the way to the hotel, so I could use the bathroom?My wedding dress hardly fit into the doorway! We laughed so hard, the tears rolled down our faces. I wish we could do it all over again.

All the wishes in the world could never bring you back to me. We don't have a second chance. Do we? So many questions are swimming around in my mind right now. Can't you just come back? Why did this happen to us? Do you think about me, and our three beautiful children?
 I even have anger toward you. How could you do this to us? You left me with so much to take care of. I'm still too scared to go down into the basement when a fuse blows. I need you back to do these things for me! We were so pleasantly happy together. Why at this moment, did you choose to leave?

Either you were too perfect, or God wants me to be miserable. He took you away from me. Way too soon. We never went to Italy, we never built our own house, we never took the kids to Disneyland. But most of all, we didn't open your restaurant. We still had so many dreams to make come true and I'm sorry, I just thought we had our whole lives to spend together.

Arts and crafts :)

Me, my sister, and grandma made these together! It was a really fun and simple project, and they turned out awesome! Mandy said while we were making them, "couldn't we have just bought these premade?" We all agreed that we could have... But they would not look as cute! We all did something different to our own, and this is what mine looks like! i just love brown and green together, and I adore buttons! Mandy and dee dee made theirs to go on little picture frame stands, but I chose to hang mine. They are so much fun and I recommend doing something like this with your family! Family makes everything a million times more enjoyable.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Being Grateful

It seems that some of the blogs I have been reading (and writing myself!) have all been about what we WANT.
I am really trying hard to be thankful for what I have, instead of having all these materialistic, so called "needs".  Do I REALLY need fall boots, an IPad, jewelry, a new hair color, etc? No. And to go even farther, do I need internet, cable, and a new cell phone? Probably not. Those things seem too hard to give up, right? I mean, I can live without a brand new phone, internet for a little while, and cable, while I'm trying to move into my new house... but I definitely don't have to have extra wardrobe accessories, a new image, or luxury items. That's all they are. I need to be grateful for the things right in front of me. I am so thankful for first

  • My husband. I would not be here today if it weren't for him. I was in a VERY dark place when I first met Adam, and God bless him for finding the light he found in me. He has taught me patience, forgiveness, acceptance, and so much more. Adam pulled that light from the deepest depression right to the surface. He used to make me say positive things about me EVERYDAY. We would be laying together and he'd ask, "What's your favorite thing about yourself?" I couldn't say the same answer twice. He also asked what my favorite part of the day was. It really helped me to chin up, and keep an up-beat attitude. I am so grateful to have him. I love you Adam Dragon!

  • My son. Carson gave me reason to start taking care of my diabetes. I never really put forth the effort in to taking care of my disease, until I got pregnant. Something in me (besides Carson, himself!) made me realize that I had to take care of myself and get my blood sugars perfect, or I would not be able to see my son grow up. I have never been healthier since the day I got pregnant. He makes me want to be the best in everything, so he has an amazing example of a mother. I am so happy that the both of us are here today, and I know that I need to take care of myself now and forever, so that I can see Carson grow. I am so grateful to have someone to motivate me. I love you Carson Riley Dragon!


  • My mother. I cried right after writing those two words. I am more grateful for my mother, than ANYTHING in the entire world. I never realized this until she was gone. She drove me nuts, tagging along at every doctor's appointment I had with Carson, snooping, prying, and just being a mom. Haha. I'm so glad I realized she was just loving me and keeping me safe. If I had not given birth to Carson while she was here, I would have never been able to thank her for being such a great Mom. The first few days after having Carson my mom said to me "Do you see now, why I have done the things I have done, and that I have just been protecting you? You never want any bad thing to happen to him, do you?" She was totally right. Mom taught me how to stay strong, that I could do so much more than other people thought I was capable of. We always found a (creative) way for me to be able to do things. Once, we tied a string to the shifting gears on our four-wheeler that I could use to pull it in to gear, because I couldn't pull up with my bad leg. We once healed a bad wound on my ankle by creating our own hyperbaric chamber with her oxygen machine and a plastic bag (lots of tape was involved) I am so grateful that my mother showed me love, so I can show others. I love you Mama C. 
I'm grateful for so much more, like the opportunities I have in life, the friends and family I have, the advice that has been given to me, the laughter all around me, and so much more. Thanks everyone, for being a part of my life. I truly love all of you and appreciate you in an individual, and personal way.